Thai Ping Pong

So on Sunday we decided to check out the local mall. We went to Siam Paragon which is one of the largest malls in Bangkok. Now don't get it f*ucked up. I wasn't forced to go to the mall. I do my fair share of shopping and challenge anyone (male or female) to a shopping endurance test.

Anyway, we proceeded to shop at the usual suspects (gucci, zegna, ferragamo, etc.) looking for bargains. No deals to be had! You're better off going to 5th ave. for a better selection and cheaper prices. After the 10% service charge AND the VAT, it's just not worth the price (even with a strong USD).

As we stepped out of the mall onto Rama Road several men kept approaching me......wanting to "show me Ping Pong". Now, I played football in college and only watch/participate in real sports (football, soccer, basketball, etc.). You know......sports where one actually sweats. I save the recreational games (ping pong, golf, billiards, etc.) to the old and out of shape.

Anyway, these guys kept harassing me for the rest of the night about some damn ping pong show. So now its like midnight, we've eaten dinner, and we go to a bar for some drinks. After 4 hours, I'm starting to get really f*cking annoyed with all this ping pong pestering. I mean......who wants to play ping pong at 1 am in the damn morning.

Finally, a guy pulls out a card with a menu full of prices for a variety of karma sutra positions. He was inviting me to a Patpong Show. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Talk about not reading the context clues. These guys were trying to sell me some a$$........all while I'm with my girl. Needless to say, we found the entire experience quite amusing and laughed all the way back to the hotel.

On a final note, during our night excursion we did notice a reoccurring theme...........this will however require a dedicated post! (I may even have to recruit a guest author!) Here is a sneak peak! (key words: old men and lady boys)

$1.50 Put-Put taxi and Thai Negotiations 101

Where are these in NYC when you need a quick ride? I know we have the rickshaw pedal cabs, but who needs a guy riding a bike when you can ride in the middle of the street in a golf cart? I want my Put-Put taxi! Not only can they zip through traffic, but $1.50 USD can take you a long ass way. You can't even get into a NY cab with the meter reading less than $2.50.........I don't think I'm going to make it back to the states.

These put-put taxis are so common, they are part of Thailand's arts and crafts. Now at the Suan-Lum Night Bazaar you can pick up a Heineken model put-put for 350 ฿ (Baht). Don't do it! We've mastered the art of Thai bargaining. First, cut the price in half! It doesn't matter what you are trying to buy, if you look gullible (a.k.a. American) you will pay more. Once you've established a reserve price, test if the seller will go lower. If not, slowly work your way up to a "fair" price.

If the seller is not offended and will go lower, ask "what is the price for 2"....then 3...etc. Once you get the wholesale price for 3 or 4, use that as your new base reserve price for a quantity of 1! When employing this technique you can buy your very own Heineken put-put model for a mere 170 ฿. This also works for negotiating your put-put taxi fares. Good luck!

NYC to Bangkok.......in only 24 hours!

I had no idea! I've traveled a lot, but never to southeast asia. Now I know why. We boarded the plane at JFK 10am on Friday morning. Couple hours layover in Tokyo and then straight to Bangkok. Long ass flights, but I was able to do a lot of reading. I think I've found my new favorite magazine, Trader Daily. I've recently subscribed, but didn't feel like waiting 6-8 weeks for my first issue to arrive. Although, I have selective A.D.D. (self-diagnosed), I actually read the whole thing cover to cover. And I NEVER have the time or patience to do that. (My findings will need a separate post.)

So we're staying at a new hotel, Dream. Seems cool. I like the vibe and the in-room dining menu seems quite tasty. (I'll have to give a more detailed report on my stay at Dream).

We are off to our first taste of Bangkok nightlife. First we're headed to bed supperclub. (Again, a more detailed report will follow).





I'm out!